The Case of the Missing Brain, Part 1

Returning to Camp Skateboard, they are all asleep. Jed describes the scene to the cameras, “I wake up at the end of my little nap after I delegate my duties and there’s no fishnet to be found.”

(Note the words, “delegate my duties” which means I told other people to do my work because I’m a lazy-ass. Also notice the downplaying of nap to a “little” nap, thus trying to make it seem like napping wasn’t such a big deal.)

“Me and Robb walked around the beach and searched for it. Basically, whoever last was watching it didn’t delegate off duties and let it drift away.”

(Hmm… The super-sleuth rubs his chin… the repeated use of the word “delegate” raises suspicion…)

Robb continues to live up to his reputation, “We figured if we left the net out of awhile, we may catch some fish and we might eat and feel good. Well, the damn net floated away. We don’t know where the net is!”

The mystery is, who, in addition to Robb, was responsible for the net. Jed said that “whoever last was watching it,” which tells me that maybe it wasn’t him. But being that he and Robb were the most concerned about it being gone…

Let’s ask Shii Ann, “Those boys took the fishing net out.” She changed her voice to dopey mocking, “We’re going to leave it out in the ocean for hours and hours.” And then she solves the mystery, “Because Jed was asleep and unwilling to get up, the fishing net… went bye-bye.”

This is so alliance dude. And Robb refuses to understand the concept of personal responsibility. “The damn net floated away,” as if the net did it all on its own.

Robb is so entirely sitcom. This is exactly something Gilligan would do. Someday, I want to write a sitcom and like most sitcoms I’ll have a duphus. What I’ll do is simply hire Robb to just be there. I won’t have to write anything. Instead, I’ll ask, “OK Robb, what would you do in this situation?” Chances are it’ll be funnier than anything I could come up with on my own.

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